The best way to forgive or pardon family is just to do it.
Because neither one of you opted into the relationship.
Isn’t that odd when you think about it?
Your spouse is the only one you get a say in choosing.
You don’t get to pick your parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, or children.
Pardon family because you should give someone handcuffed to you the benefit of the doubt.
I tell you, families are definitely the training ground for forgiveness. At some point you pardon the people in your family for being stuck together in all their weirdness, and when you can do that, you can learn to pardon anyone. Even yourself, eventually. It’s like learning to drive on an old car with a tricky transmission: if you can master shifting gears on that, you can learn to drive anything.
-Anne Lamott, Traveling Mercies