Sterling Terrell

smart ideas from books (mostly)

  • Home
  • About
    • My CV
    • Books
    • Series
  • Newsletter
  • Advertising
  • Tools
You are here: Home / Potpourri / When Our Kids Share Feelings

When Our Kids Share Feelings

When Our Kids Share Feelings

My gut reaction is nearly always the same as yours here.

I hear a noise, I walk into a room, and I’m suddenly in the middle of an issue. I start in:

“Why are you crying? What’s wrong? What happened?”

This immediately takes an adversarial tone when I do not get a prompt answer.

You too?

Acceptance and love are what is needed.

So easy to understand this intuitively…

So hard to remember this in the moment.

Plain and simple: Our kids share their feelings more easily when they feel safe.

Some children can tell you why they’re frightened, angry, or unhappy. For many, however, the question “Why?” only adds to their problem. In addition to their original distress, they must now analyze the cause and come up with a reasonable explanation. Very often children don’t know why they feel as they do. At other times they’re reluctant to tell because they fear that in the adult’s eyes their reason won’t seem good enough. (“ For that you’re crying?”) It’s much more helpful for an unhappy youngster to hear, “I see something is making you sad,” rather than to be interrogated with “What happened?” or “Why do you feel that way?” It’s easier to talk to a grown-up who accepts what you’re feeling rather than one who presses you for explanations.

-Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk (Amazon)

Share this:

  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Pocket (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window)

Related

Filed Under: PotpourriTagged With: #Parenting, #Understanding

Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Privacy Policy

Connect

  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter

Free Weekly Newsletter:

Search

Top Posts

  • The Tricky Lily Pad Riddle (You Probably Can't Solve)
    The Tricky Lily Pad Riddle (You Probably Can't Solve)
  • Hyatt Hill Country Sunday House
    Hyatt Hill Country Sunday House
  • Can You Solve The Bat And Ball Riddle?
    Can You Solve The Bat And Ball Riddle?
  • The Big Miss, By: Hank Haney
    The Big Miss, By: Hank Haney
  • Another Great Riddle For You To Try
    Another Great Riddle For You To Try
  • Instabooks 317
    Instabooks 317
  • Kindle Copy Error
    Kindle Copy Error
  • Godspeed - The Pace Of Being Known
    Godspeed - The Pace Of Being Known
  • Instabooks 169
    Instabooks 169
  • The Tragedy Of Gina "Bronco" Bouza (1932-1957)
    The Tragedy Of Gina "Bronco" Bouza (1932-1957)

Supporting = Loving

Recent Posts

  • Ship More Projects
  • Few Days And Full Of Trouble
  • Father’s Days Days Are Swim Days Swim
  • Random Thoughts – 344
  • Creative Forces Converged
  • When Laughing Is More Contagious
  • LubbockJobs.io
  • Instabooks 363
  • Random Thoughts – 343
  • From This Sun And A Cold Drink
  • The Psychology When Midlife Crisis Hits
  • Smoke Eaters
  • For The Elite See It And
  • Random Thoughts – 342
  • Austin Kleon, A Note To Graduates
  • Example Of Writing Material
  • The Rule Of I Before E
  • He Silently Sits And Sleeps
  • Random Thoughts – 341
  • Martin Mull
  • Early Retirement In One Lesson
  • On Being Consistently Good
  • And The Last Heart Will Weep When
  • Random Thoughts – 340
  • Fundamentally A Loner

Copyright © 2022 · Generate Pro On Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in