Sterling Terrell

recovering economist

On Giving Kids Instant Solutions

On Giving Kids Instant Solutions

I believe that giving our kids instant solutions deprives them of the best part of a struggle:

Thinking it through.

Maybe we can help point out an obstacle, by saying something like “Oh, wow. That is a problem.”

Or we can encourage critical thinking by saying: “I wonder if we could think of a few solutions to that?”

But if we give them the answers, our kids don’t even get a chance to have an original idea. And if they did have an idea, we have talked over them before they were able to share it!

This is another example of the importance of teaching our children how to think, rather than what to think.

When we give children advice or instant solutions, we deprive them of the experience that comes from wrestling with their own problems.

-Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk (Amazon)

The Virtue On Getting Children To Draw Their Feelings

The Virtue On Getting Children To Draw Their Feelings

You will just have to take my word on this and try if for yourself, I suppose.

When your children are emotional (particularly mad) getting them to draw their feelings works wonders.

You may have to stand over them and ask a few questions here and there to keep them going,

They relax in the shoulders as soon as they start. Within a second you can see it in their face.

The best part is seeing what they come up with.

But my guess is that you already knew that…

We’ve heard many stories about angry children who have felt calmer after punching pillows, hammering old grocery cartons, pounding and kneading clay, roaring like a lion, throwing darts. But the one activity that seems most comfortable for parents to watch, and most satisfying for children to do, is to draw their feelings.

-Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk (Amazon)

Sterling Terrell