Uh, I think there are many occasions where being empathetically caring/friendly and saying clarifying statements or questions can be of great help.
You might know the answer – or you might not – but making your listener examine questions they may have never considered can go a long way.
This is a reminder to use more of this attitude with our children (with my children): “Oh, wow. Hmmm. I wonder why you feel that way.”
Of course, this works on adults too.
You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make them drink, as they say…
There’s a lot of help to be had from a simple “Oh . . . mmm . . .” or “I see.” Words like these, coupled with a caring attitude, are invitations to a child to explore her own thoughts and feelings, and possibly come up with her own solutions.
-Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk (Amazon)
