Having no real friends is a topic that most of us would like to ignore.
Why?
It’s personal, painful, and uncomfortable to discuss. ðŸ«
But I think it is rampant today.
We leave our families at 18, and we leave our communities and hometowns for jobs we should probably care much less about.
Our sense of community is dying because of this.
And, along with it, our religious and national pride that kept us together for so long is dying too.
I see it in myself.
My family moved away from the largest part of our extended family, and then I moved away from the little family that was left.
I made the best of friends in high school…
But I moved away from them, too.
For what? A dead-end job I hated?
Then life happens.
You have work. You’re tired from work. And then you are married with kids.
It’s great! But who has time for anything else? Especially friends.
You look up, and the responsibilities keep coming.
Heaven forbid you’re an introvert like me on top of everything else…
A decade and a half later, you realize you are acquainted with everyone, and friends with no one.
Sound familiar?
It’s only now that I am beginning to find community again.
My advice? Get. Yourself. In. A. Small. Group.
I do it through church, but I think you could find another common interest.
Understand: Life is about relationships.
You matter to EVERYONE forever.
That September I entered Vanderbilt, and with my year’s worth of credits I managed to take mostly sophomore classes, trying to fit myself into a program where I was already two or three years older than my classmates. I was not only older, however, but far more experienced, not to mention eccentric, than the other students. I had no interest in the social aspects of college, which made it impossible for me to feel a part of the community, and I don’t think I spoke more than ten words a day for the entire academic year. I liked my studies, particularly a creative writing class, which was taught by Walter Sullivan, a brilliant writer himself, and while I found a mild sense of camaraderie there, I still made no real friends.