Why do we so often find ourselves fighting in a guerrilla war at home?

You know what I am talking about. It’s the silent, often mean and passive-aggressive, wars that are raged behind closed doors.

A comment is made by mom, a text is sent to a sibling, dad calls you back, whispers are exchanged in a back room, plans are rearranged, feelings are hurt, the husband says something, more whispers. Repeat.

(Honestly, I think this is most common between old women and their grown daughters.)

But what do I know?

Being an only child, I think I have much less experience in this than most.

And yes, it’s not “gorilla war” – it’s “guerrilla war.”

I close the drawer, and have another cup of coffee with my mother. We get along very well, veterans of a guerrilla war we never understood.

-Joan Didion, Slouching Towards Bethlehem