Sterling Terrell

recovering economist

Too Tired To Talk To Her?

Too Tired To Talk To Her?

Are you too tired to talk?

Yeah – me too.

There is even a running morning joke around here about Coffee = Silence.

And after a full day at work? I am definitely not up for a lot of talking then.

But you might want to rethink all that.

We might want to rethink it.

Heck – typing this feels like the biggest form of hypocrisy I can muster.

But be mindful of that little precious girl trying to get your attention.

She is beautiful and perfect – and soon – she won’t be asking for your attention nearly as much.

Females of all ages tend to interpret masculine silence as evidence of rejection. Based on this understanding, the best thing dads can do to connect with their daughters is to talk to them about whatever is of interest. Ask questions and then listen carefully to what is said in return. This interaction helps to produce the affirmation I have been describing. Meaningful and affectionate dialogue with a daughter is evidence that she is worthy, secure, and loved. Those beneficial effects can be achieved so easily through simple, genuine conversation.

–Dr. James Dobson, Bringing Up Girls

From Leaning On Our Parents, To Not

From Leaning On Our Parents, To Not

Funny how much most of us are leaning on our parents, isn’t it?

At first, we depend on them completely of course.

And then as they slowly move into the background – as we learn independence – our dependence often moves from a physical one to more of an emotional one.

You may not live in the same town, but you can still always call and ask for advice. “How do I…”

Your parents can become your cheerleaders.

But it’s different for everyone, you know.

Good-grief, I am about to be 37 – and my dad still plays “Mr.-fix-it” when he comes over.

Here is the truth though: Almost regardless of the relationship you have with your parents, losing them is never a small thing.

No matter how old you are, everything changes when your parents die. The wall between you and death collapses; suddenly gone are the only people who could speak with true authority. My life has been spent chasing mentors, each of them being like a substitute parent, but when your real parents die, you realize certain things are irreplaceable. They go and never come back. It’s a blow. This is what it means to be an orphan.

— Jerry Weintraub and Rich Cohen, When I Stop Talking, You’ll Know I’m Dead

Sterling Terrell